Awaiting My Sailboat ~ Remembering Full Moons Past


The Full Moon in Cancer appeared this week and it felt largely like a stronger conviction to my feminine power and its purpose to nurture, secure, heal in this lifetime. But, perhaps, with Venus Retrograde directly on my ascendant it felt like a quiet energy, a soft reminder.

Then I awoke this morning and remembered that this week is quite significant for me. For it was 5 years ago that I consciously chose to start my search for personal freedom and true fulfillment. Yeah, kind of a big deal.

Much like this week, there was a beautiful full moon in my sun sign. It fell on January 11, 2009 at 22 degrees of Cancer, embracing the sabian symbol of a young woman awaiting a sailboat. During that time, I had many vivid dreams about an ex and I would often wake up craving the amazing connection we had and continue daydreaming about the wonderful life we could have together.

There was a day, several days after the full moon, when I just decided, very out of nowhere, that I was going to stop waiting for my happily ever after and go get it. That was also the day that I decided to become a single mother and change my life forever.

I was greatly inspired that day by a book shared with me the previous summer by a colleague. The book is called The Invitation by Oriah Mountain Dreamer and here is an excerpt from her poem:

I want to know if you can live with failure
yours and mine
and still stand on the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,

That day I chose to say, “Yes.” Despite my past failures, despite who I would disappoint, despite the future challenges, despite my deepest fears, I said, “Yes.” to life.

Today I am reminded that my fantasies are some of the most beautiful parts of my mind. And I should never stop dreaming. I should never stop believing. The most miraculous things happen when we decide to listen to our soul and speak our truth. The most miraculous things happen when we stop waiting for our ship to arrive and we dive into the water and go swimming for it.

Happy Full Moon. Love and light xoxo